Is Couples Therapy For You?

Guest Blog by Jomana Sweiss, PsyD.

When is it a good idea to meet with a couples therapist?

It is helpful to meet with a couples therapist anytime, however, it is beneficial to meet earlier than many couples may think–you don't have to wait until your relationship is in crisis. If you notice recurring conflicts or negative interaction patterns, it's a good time to seek therapy. If you are going through a major life change like moving in together, getting married, having children, or retiring therapy can help navigate these transitions. In addition, if you're experiencing a lack of intimacy or emotional distance, a safe therapeutic space can help explore the underlying reasons and work towards rebuilding your emotional connection. 

Why did you choose to be a couples therapist in Los Angeles?

A big part of my work in private practice is with couples. Watching couples learn how to express themselves more effectively and listen to each other with greater empathy and understanding fulfills me. Witnesting them rediscover and nurture the emotional bonds that brought them together, especially during times of stress or major life transitions is gratifying.

What kind of treatment do you provide?

I am someone who tries to tailor treatment to people’s needs. Clients can expect to experience a psychodynamic approach blended with practical skills like DBT, and an incorporated element of trauma-informed care and attachment theory when appropriate. 

Do you have a specific approach when working with couples?

Yes, I use a blend of Gottman and EFT therapy. When appropriate I also teach couples how to regulate and co-regulate using Dialectical Behavior Therapy’s distress tolerance and emotion regulation skills.  We’ll work together to ensure each partner’s personal needs are heard and respected.

Is couples therapy only available when all other options have been exhausted?

Absolutely not! I actually encouraged couples to not wait until things feel “broken.” Just like with your physical health, addressing issues early can prevent them from becoming more serious problems down the line. Even couples who feel their relationship is strong can benefit from therapy. It can help enhance intimacy, deepen understanding, and fortify the relationship against future challenges.

What can a couple expect to leave with after working with you?

After working with me, couples can expect to leave with a more resilient relationship and a set of practical tools to maintain their connection. Some couples have shared that it was in our space that they stopped to think about the history of unhelpful patterns that may be causing distress and learn how to break these cycles. Couples have shared they feel more secure with their partner, learning to recognize and respond to each other's emotional needs. Further, couples will also feel both more emotionally and physically intimate. My goal is to equip you with the understanding and tools to continue solidifying your relationship long after our sessions end.  

How long have you been working as a couples therapist?

I began working with couples in 2014 during my professional training. Over the past 10 years, I have honed my skills and deepened my understanding of the intricate dynamics that shape romantic partners.  

Who are your favorite types of clients to work with?

 I like to work with clients who are overwhelmed by powerful emotions, major life changes, or ADHD and who may need calm and peace within their internal storm. 

What happens during a first appointment with you in couples therapy?

1. I'll start by welcoming you both and briefly explaining how I work as a therapist. This helps set the tone for our sessions and addresses any immediate questions or concerns you might have.

2. We'll review the paperwork you filled out before our session in my EHR.  I'll explain confidentiality and its limits to ensure you understand how your privacy is protected.

3. I'll ask what you hope to achieve. This helps me understand your goals and expectations, and any possible limitations.

4. We'll discuss your relationship history, including how you met, significant milestones, and any major challenges you've faced together.

5. I'll give each of you time to share your individual perspectives on the current state of your relationship and the issues you're facing.

6. We'll explore the strengths of your relationship–these can be important resources 

7. We'll discuss a tentative plan and any immediate interventions that might be helpful.

8. There will be time for you to ask any questions you have about the therapy process or anything we've discussed.

What do you wish more people knew about couples therapy?

I wish more people knew that couples therapy is not just for when your relationship is in crisis. Within a safe space, you will create valuable tools to strengthen their connection, improve communication, and navigate life's challenges together. 

How can people learn more and contact you?

People can contact me directly at jomana@atwatervillagetherapy.com and can also make an appointment through our website portal:  https://atwatervillagetherapy.com/jomanasweiss

What's one fun thing about you that most people don't know?

That's a great question! It's important to remember that therapists are people too, with our own interests and quirks outside of the office. For me, a few fun things that most people don't know:  I like taking my dog to the dog beach, I enjoy finding hidden gems, like charming “hole-in-the-wall” restaurants, and I deeply value quality time spent with my loved ones; whether it's a casual gathering in the backyard or a special occasion, I try my best to create lasting memories with my family and friends.